I'm sick today.

Sometimes there are really, really, ridiculous sounding articles on the MSN.com...homepage, or whatever. So, I was just browsing the site because I was bored and needed something to shamelessly mock for no apparent reason. And I found this, which is an article entitled: Letting Go Of Guilt. Unless you actually go there and read it, you won't understand that it is aimed entirely at women. Apparently men don't feel guilty. Anyway, it listed some scenarios which women might feel guilt about, some of which were legitimate. Some were just retarded. Like, for example:

"The other moms made their kids' Halloween costumes-but yours are from the drugstore."

That is no reason to feel guilty, I don't think. I imagine the "other moms" spent hours and hours sewing elaborate things their child will wear once and forget about, and all you did was go to the drugstore and buy something. Think of the time you saved!

Also, who would feel guilty about the fact that they would rather read a romance novel than the newspaper?! Unless you were on really close terms with the editors of said newspaper, in which case I don't think you would run around advertising the fact that you decided to read a book than another article on terrorists.

The only thing I came away from this article with was a gnawing suspicion that I might identify more with guys than girls, when I get old.

Is that a problem?


(p.s.: I was just typing a text message to someone that included the word "taking" and for some reason it came out as "ugling." Thank you, T9!)

Why not?

One thing I don't understand is the people who name their children Espn. That doesn't even look like a normal name. Also, if you're that obsessed with watching sports tv, why on earth are you reproducing? I vote you stop, now. Apparently last year there were three children named Espn, and another one recently. I think that four Espns is enough.

Actually, I'm consiering naming my first child Mtv. And then maybe one named Vh1. I'm a little confused on how one would pronounce that, but I have a while to figure it out. But! Does it matter? No, because I just love Vh1 that much that I am willing to have my child mocked for years and years. MTV and VH1, you are my only friends. If not for you, I would have some kind of terrible social life, and friends, pesky friends that would call me and want to do things, like hang out and...leave my house. I'm not ready for that yet. Maybe some day. And it will be a sad day, television channels.

Memos

TO: The old woman driving behind me today
RE: Your hand gestures

What's that? You so love the beautiful voice of Yung Joc that you want me to turn it up even louder? Alright, I guess I could do that for you. Wait, what do you want now? More bass?!?!? Of course I can do that!! Also, I hope you appreciate the huge cloud of blue smoke my car just left for you!

TO: The person that flashed their brites and honked at me tonight
RE: Why?!?!?

I did not do anything! My brites weren't on, my light was green, you were yielding to me (remember? you did not have an arrow!), and, for once, I was going the speed limit! So maybe you should stop being an idiot. Ok?