I Think I Need Not To Be Rescued

Mood: Waaay not here.
iTunes: If I Die - Something Corporate

I woke up at 700 am today. Because I had the bright idea that going to school would be a million times awesomer than sitting around at home all day.

You know it's going to be a loooong day when your first period teacher asks you if you "drank your parents New Year's Eve leftovers for breakfast." Thanks, but my parents don't drink, sir. He also asked me if I spiked my coffee. Yeaaaah, no.

I woke up and my eyes were more bloodshot than I have ever seen them and I really don't know why, other than I have gotten roughly 6 hours of sleep since last Wednesday. It was a long and occasionally fun weekend, though. Actually. There was only one really amusing time, and it was at 1230 am on Sunday morning. I had been texting a very wasted Blake on and off all night and he decided that it would be cool to call me when he went to bed. Only I was already half asleep. I talked to him for like an hour and a half, and it was the funniest thing that had happened to me in like 3 days. It was a good start to the new year, I believe.

New year. Wow. I was sitting there all contemplative and stuff after his phone died on me, and I was thinking. A lot. I mean, 2005 was a really weird year for me. I changed like completely, and I'm still changing. I did things I'd never ever even thought I would do, and I spent a lot of time regretting some of them. At around 600 pm on Friday night, I stopped regretting a lot of things, as a result of more thinking-time. I was okay. Everything was perfect. It still is, and I think it will be for a while now.

And the year's been going for...a lot of hours now, and I still haven't done anything I regret. I'm glad. Maybe this year will be as good/bad/confusing/weird as last year. I loved it, now that it's over. All the people I met and forgot, and all the friends I ditched and forgot, and all the ones who forgot me, and all the guys I had issues with (read: all 3 of them [i'm cutting back]), and all the partying I didn't do, and all the partying I did do, and all the mistakes I made, and all the mistakes made for me, and all the growing I did, and all the moving around, and all the shifting of opinions, and all the blaming, and all the writing and drawing and copying and cheating, and lying and forgetting and omissions of the full story, and all the truth I told that didn't make a difference anyway. All the jealousy, all the annoyance, all the boredom, all the hyper-ness, all the feeling completely un-sober even though I was.

I did a lot this year. Now I'm going to go home and go to sleep. My year's just starting, two days late.

I'm back, yo.

-megan.