Mood: Distracted. And mad. And getting madder.
iTunes: Oh - Dave Matthews Band
Gmail isn't working, for some reason. I can't email my mom and ask if I can go home early, and that makes me angry. Also, she gave me this huge long speech about what I should do with my life this morning. I don't appreciate this.
There are a lot of things making me angry at the moment. My hair didn't straighten as well as I would have liked it to this morning. I think I failed my chemistry test last period. Or not quite failed, because I know I passed, but I don't know if I passed as well as I wanted to.
Gmail is still down. And I apparently can't type worth anything at this moment.
Too many people are telling me what to do on a now-daily basis. Before, I only got told once in a while, it was really easy to ignore it.
Suddenly, everybody knows better than me who I should hang out with, who I should like, where I should go, what I should be saving up for, how much I should be saving, how often I should be working, where I should be working, what I should be listening to, what I should dwell on, what I should forget and move on from, and so on.
I have gone for 17 years and 2 months without making any huge life-altering/damaging mistakes. I've made big mistakes. But I'm not prematurely dead, or hopelessly addicted to anything, or a teenaged single mother with absolutely no hope or prospects. I'm okay. I think that I will continue to be okay if I go out with him, or go to that school, or listen to that song.
Really.
iTunes: Oh - Dave Matthews Band
Gmail isn't working, for some reason. I can't email my mom and ask if I can go home early, and that makes me angry. Also, she gave me this huge long speech about what I should do with my life this morning. I don't appreciate this.
There are a lot of things making me angry at the moment. My hair didn't straighten as well as I would have liked it to this morning. I think I failed my chemistry test last period. Or not quite failed, because I know I passed, but I don't know if I passed as well as I wanted to.
Gmail is still down. And I apparently can't type worth anything at this moment.
Too many people are telling me what to do on a now-daily basis. Before, I only got told once in a while, it was really easy to ignore it.
Suddenly, everybody knows better than me who I should hang out with, who I should like, where I should go, what I should be saving up for, how much I should be saving, how often I should be working, where I should be working, what I should be listening to, what I should dwell on, what I should forget and move on from, and so on.
I have gone for 17 years and 2 months without making any huge life-altering/damaging mistakes. I've made big mistakes. But I'm not prematurely dead, or hopelessly addicted to anything, or a teenaged single mother with absolutely no hope or prospects. I'm okay. I think that I will continue to be okay if I go out with him, or go to that school, or listen to that song.
Really.
I know that I am only 17, and you are like twice my age or whatever, and you have experience with these things, and you don't want me to make the same mistakes you did. But I don't learn like that. I can't listen to something and know it's absolutely true. That's going to be something I have to learn for myself. Also, I'm not the same person as you, in case you didn't notice. I won't do well in certain situations that you may have been amazing in. Things that made all the difference in the world for you may not do the same for me.
I only have 17 years of experience, and crappy judgement on top of that, but you were 17 once. And you're still alive, and successful, and were even on the brink of making life-changing decisions like I'm about to - although, I bet you chose differently. And it worked for you, so it must be the same for everyone else! Right?
Nope.
-megan.
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